The love for your child is like nothing you have ever experienced before. It’s instantaneous and fuels deep inside you. As your newborn curls on your chest, you feel the beat of their heart so close to yours, you feel love like you never thought possible— unless that doesn’t happen.
My child had slow uterine growth and I had a placental abruption at 32 weeks. My body rapidly declining — I met advanced life support en route to hospital. My blood pressure was dangerously low.
Things were not looking good. Fortunately, bleeding was controlled but my small baby was under…
I’m exhausted by my child’s needs. I said it. I’m admitting to what I am not supposed to, but a parent of a child with complex needs is not superhuman. They were not gifted with this being because “only special parents are gifted special children.”
My son is eleven and requires assistance for many tasks his younger brother tackles without reservation, from toileting to hygiene to nutrition to mental health care. He has anxiety that unequivocally breaks him, and me. Compounding this reality are his social limitations, which are exasperated during the pandemic.
Being present for him all…
As I write this, I am waiting.
My surgeon called yesterday, “stop eating or drinking. We will be bringing you in today.” He paused — adding, “If not today, tomorrow.” Another pause. “Or, Saturday. You are coming in shortly. Likely today. The hospital will call you with the arrangements, stay near your phone,” he continued — providing an odd combination of definitive plans and great uncertainty.
Hours later, low blood sugar bringing on an intense, nauseating headache. Staying at the office, trying to work through it — I wave the white flag, heading home from work — ill. Somewhat disoriented.
This approach to home schooling will not work for everyone, so let me manage your expectations right now. For others, it might present a lightbulb moment and for that hope, I am passing it along. This is about the trick I wish I learned a little bit sooner.
Home schooling provides the opportunity to customize the learning environment which makes it particularly beneficial. It also means that there is not a one solution for everyone.
However, this approach provided a brilliant light-bulb moment for us — so if your child is like mine (read more here), this just might be…
September. The golden edges of leaves on trees begin to appear and children fill halls of local schools with their excitement bouncing from wall-to-wall like a rubber ball let loose. Meanwhile, a few children try to find a rare quiet space to sit outside, on their own, doing everything possible to avoid the mass stimulation from others.
My child being one of “the few” in that latter scenario. Trying for six years, working with his support team to help him adjust to the environment — realizing the flexibility of the environment is that of a brick and my child’s neurological…
Path is defined as a way of life, conduct, or thought; a route connecting one place to another. Sometimes we know EXACTLY where we are going — and other times, we are completely lost.
Even if the route you are on is the latter, remember some of the most beautiful paths cannot be discovered without getting lost.
The day this photo was taken, my mindset uncertain. Struggling mentally with full capacity box, yet completely lacking fulfillment — time in the woods and on this particular path, I began to find myself (full story here).
Where will the path lead you?
Parenting is filled with moments that test your patience, show you a love like know other and bring more than a few laughs along the way. Reflecting on these moments, gave me a chuckle and I hope they translate for you, too.
What are those moments that remind you, your life is not quite the same as it was before you had kids?
Tucking away the Hallowe’en candy so the kids wouldn’t eat it all at once, I found the perfect hiding spot —until a funny smell arose one day when I was pre-heating the oven.
Sitting down for Christmas…
Following WWII, scientists in the United Kingdom embarked on a mammoth project. Researchers planned to poll every woman who gave birth during a one-week period in 1946, because they were interested in the situation for mothers in the war-torn country. As a result, 14,000 thorough questionnaires covering every element of birth in Britain at the time were created (Wadsworth et al., 2006).
A generation later, this was repeated — several times over. Ultimately, polling 70,000 children as they progressed through life over a 70-year period! The study sought understanding regarding health, education and overall well-being (Wadsworth et al., 2006).
“Responsive parenting and parental scaffolding have been shown to foster executive functions (EFs) and self-regulation skills in young children, but could too much parental directive engagement be counterproductive?” This is the leading question in a study published by the American Psychological Association.
The study examined 102 dyads (parental figure-child duos) and the parental response to children’s “on task” behaviours. The researchers measured the time parents spent guiding children’s behaviour in relation to letting the child lead; reflecting on the resulting behaviours helped identify thresholds of “over-engagement” (Obradović et al., 2021).
In the study, kindergarten-age children played, cleaned up toys, learned…
In regards to = regarding. Slamming the breaks, the black from the tires translating onto the pavement, I stopped.
Does each word you write have a purpose? Are you clear and concise in translating thoughts from your mind to your keyboard?
The fact that I just asked the same question, twice, shows this is not my strength. Brevity and me? We’re on opposing sides.
I am working on it.
Burning out the break pads, I rapidly delete o-t-s-d-r-a-g-e-d-s-n-i… insert r-e-g-a-r-d-i-n-g. Just like that, 3 words into 1; voila! I caught myself, without an editing tool.
This is a first.